Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Please read this blog post on the dangers of being a woman in may parts of the world, or the article he links to, about young women in Mexico brought into the drug cartel and used.

The world is not a safe place, and it is especially not that way for women. Biological facts mean that women are more at risk for rape than men, and not only from the obvious emotional, physical, and psychological trauma. For instance, if a woman were to contract an STD from the result of such an attack, the effects will be far greater than those on a man, and yet she is far less likely to have any symptoms -- many STD's are asymptomatic in up to 80% of women (I'm sorry, I no longer have the psych book with the exact statistics).

If you're still not convinced that the world is dangerous, read this NYTimes article about skateboarding in Afghanistan. The article in its entirety is quite thought-provoking, but what struck me most were these lines:

But for Hadisa, a 10-year-old girl from a conservative family, skateboarding has not been accepted. She said two older brothers beat her with wires for skating with poorer children in September. Several friends said they had seen blood flowing from her leg.

“I’m not upset with my brothers for beating me,” Hadisa whispered on a recent day when she did not skate because her oldest brother was nearby. “They have the right.”

Beaten. With wires. Please, take a moment and truly try and imagine that.

Now, as many of my female friends are planning to go abroad next year in Europe, this worries me all the more. Not so much the above notes on Afghanistan, as I don't know of anyone going to the Middle East (and if I hear that any of them happen to have such a plan, it will instigate a whole new rant), but the idea that things like this don't happen to good girls, to people in first-world countries, or even simply to you. It's not true.

I'm not saying that every girl will be raped, but truthfully, the statistics are against us. I have many good female friends. If nine of us are all hanging out together, statistics say that two or three of us will be sexually assaulted in our lifetimes.

Now, I know that most rape is acquaintance rape (aka date rape). I know that it happens, and it happens frequently, and most women never talk about it. It can be more traumatic, in fact, than stranger rape, because it is less widely accepted, and the woman in question is more likely to be told she was asking for it or that it wasn't rape. Keeping that in mind, I trust my friends to be smart, and be careful about who they hang out with, and how much alcohol they drink, and what situations they put themselves in.

But there are people out there who will attack someone they don't know, and it doesn't have to be related to sex. This article from England makes my blood run cold. If you don't want to read the whole article, here is the most important point:
When he [the rapist] was caught five days later he admitted his guilt and claimed he did it so he would end up in jail.

‘When I was on the railway station I thought I should rape this lady in order to get a place to eat and sleep and learn the English language,’ he told a psychologist.
My thoughts on this are very similar to those expressed here, namely that prison systems should be set up so as to NOT make prison a desired destination. A judge is contemplating giving this man life in prison, and yet the only time the rapist seemed particularly upset was when he was told he would departed at the end of the prison sentence -- when he was kicked out of free housing, board, and education. Now, I'm all for reform programs and education, especially for youth, but it should never, ever be enough that going to prison is a good thing. In fact, my opinion would be to castrate the man, but it is admitted that I am far less liberal than many of my friends, and perhaps many of you who may read this blog.

Okay, now that you all have sat through my rant, a few funny or interesting links to alleviate it.
- an awesome article about ballet tutus.
- a blog entry about Japanese archery.
- Yes, I've linked to this man's blog a lot in this post. It's cause he's very interesting. You should read. I mean, here's how he describes himself:
The idle musings of a former military man, former computer geek, medically retired pastor and now full-time writer. Contents guaranteed to offend the politically correct and anal-retentive from time to time. My approach to life is that it should be taken with a large helping of laughter, and sufficient firepower to keep it tamed!
- And perhaps best of all, another article out of England about letting college-age kids sleep with their boyfriend/girlfriend when visiting home. Very funny, especially for this particular gem, from the father writing the article:

I find it quite endearing, when he comes to stay and disappears at the end of the night to the spare room, although I know he’s not going to stay in there very long.

How do I know? Because I am a man, and what would I have done in the same circumstances? There’s a tacit understanding between males.

Ah yes, the male understanding. It reminds me of this Questionable Content comic. I am assured that this system is itself "far too ambiguous" and that the real thing would go down more like this. Also, for the ladies, I have first-hand accounts that the last panel of this comic is firmly grounded in truth.

(Also, thank you to Geoff for hunting down the individual panels.)

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